Farmerville Gazette, November 30, 1938
Written by Edna Liggin as Uncle Lige
Wal folks, bein’ as nobody sends the good old Gazette news from our district each week, how about letting blinking, winking, spitting Uncle Lige be your newsman?
We have some real bits of excitement hereabouts once in a while, so’s you’re born. Now fur instance, last week the woods back of Shiloh church and Frank Seibert’s house were on fire and folks went lickety split after water and the CCC boys. Good idea too, for they back-fired that fire away from that brand new church and the houses near by.
Another ‘citing instance last week was the Siamese eggs over to Mrs. R. H. Albritton’s. Seems one of her hens got sorter smart and did a double-decker. Two at a time and joined together by a tube. Soft-shell eggs, I’m a talkin’ about, believe it or not.
Kinda funny why folks tack them little words after some tremendous fact. Of course, they expect you believe it. Nobody really wants folks to believe they are lying. If they tell the truth they want you to believe it, and if they tell a lie they want you to believe it’s the truth, else they wouldn’t lie.
Yet Ripley started this believe it or not stuff and some times it does get a lot of cool lying by. It sorta puts a little frost on it. Tell a person he don’t have to believe anything, and, contrary to human nature is, he’s apt to believe it a little.
Back to my news:
Most folks here ate chicken for turkey on Thanksgiving…Jesse Fomby has a new roof on his house…Nell Liggin from Wilhite school was home for the holidays…The ladies had a big club meeting, an HDC pow-wow at Mrs. S. P. Tabor’s Monday…Farmers are meeting at R. H. Albritton’s store and putting forth the theory of raising less and less cotton and more and more of everything else…Misses Maurice Allen and Jewel Reeves of La Tech are home with their parents for the holidays…Mrs. Emma Smith and daughter, Betty Jo, Mr. J. R. Tabor and Mr. and Mrs. George Myers of Shreveport gladdened the hearts of Mr. and Mrs. S. P. Tabor at Shiloh by spending Thanksgiving with them…Mr. Green, parish music supervisor, had all Union Gin children singing with gusto and spirit Wednesday. Believe me, those kids really perk up when singing time comes. It’s a thrilling event in their lives.
I’m just about run out and anyway it’s time I went and got my whiskers a hair cut…or my wife’ll be a divorcin’ of me for intense mental cruelty. No woman should look at a man’s beard seven days of a week. He orter shave ever Sunday, shore!